Troublemakers Take a Beating
2005
Fat Guy Beats Five Streetfighters!
“I didn’t even work up a sweat”, said the breathless, rotund gentleman!
I have been a practitioner of various martial arts for my entire life since High School, so naturally I was very eager to hear about the melee that had just taken place outside the Subway at our local Mall. I edged in closer until I made contact with the large, cheerful man. He was seated on a chair amidst a small crowd of onlookers and two uniform policemen. This guy had to be every ounce of 300 lbs. plus and all smiles!
The story unfolded as “Big Boy” (he actually reminded me of the “Big Boy” statue (trademark nods etc.). “Well”, he told the cops and eager throng, “I was just ’super-sizing’ my order when these five hooligans started bothering the young redheaded lady as she made her way to the condiments bar”. “Bloody hell”, he said, “I’m hungry and those punks are going to cut into my lunch hour and deprive me of all the salt, pepper, and paper Dixie cups of delicious ketchup for my ’super-sized’ fries, and I felt we had suffered enough indignity at their hands.” I asked him what happened to the three guys cuffed already and two getting EMS treatment before being booked?
“It’s nothing really, anyone could have done the same old chap. I simply whipped out my heavy duty stun gun and let into the first of them!” What happened next I queried? “Well, the stun gun put them down hard, but a couple of the youths came at me from the right and left simultaneously and I started to really think, c’mon WWSD….what would Sensei do!”
Regaining his composure after a stiff drink of chocolate shake, he went on. “I did have an ace up my sleeve for this young bunch, and it was time to play my Trump card, once and for all!” “I have an awesome personal alarm in my vest pocket, so I pressed the activating button, and in the confusion of the noise and panic (this move definitely had them in ‘check’), I whipped off my generous size #50 belt and beat them bloody and bruised with my defense belt.” “Just picture it lad, 50 inches of tanned leather, tipped with a studded 6 ounce stainless buckle. My word, they never knew what hit them, poor buggers. Well, a lesson in manners lad, no matter how difficult, is never wasted on chaps of this sort!”
I was somewhat suspicious, as a martial arts practitioner, as to how this incredibly large, out of shape man could have actually achieved such stunning and final results. After much cajoling and begging (yes I admit it) he said he’d turn me on to one of the most wicked self defense systems on the planet. What? One we are all armed for, and is always legal in a self defense situation? “I’m ready”, I said as he handed me his card. I looked at the back and found this URL scribbled on the back. When asked, he told me “just find it lad, and watch my instructor in action, you’ll find him teaching the system and also many common self defense situations you can escape from without ever having to throw a punch.” He was truly a dangerous man as I soon saw. Your trip to his self defense class is very simple, only a click away, and free to all. Be sure to click on Survival Belt DEMO when you arrive, you will be impressed!

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