Stop Unwanted Embraces
2008
Remove That Friendly Arm Around Your Neck
I was teaching a technique to a beginner’s Karate class and it was so simple that I want to share it with my readers. This is usually good for about 98% of women and men who find an unsolicited arm-around-the-shoulder wraps – as a sure way to get that “loving” arm off in short order.
This targets the gals more than guys – most of them have at some point in life had some drunk or deranged type, sidle up alongside and throw an arm around their shoulder and wrap their arm and dangle it across and slightly around the neck. This is usually followed by some lame “pick-up” line. “Please remove the arm” is enough in some cases, but in others, due to some sort of communication impairment, the jerk just keeps it up or repeats the same move later.
Try this: Imagine yourself (or best - practice it with a friend) in this position – two people facing the same direction and one throws the arm across the shoulders and neck. How do you get your neck out and that potentially harmful arm from draping so closely to your neck? It’s really easy! This works on either side of your body and I’ll walk you through it occurring on YOUR right hand side. To practice the left side just do the exact same thing as we did on the right side. I need to preserve these tired fingertips!
You are standing in the hall at school or let’s say a nightclub. An enamored drunk, or a guy from the office who’s always staring at you, walks up alongside you and does the shoulder/neck wrap on you, muttering sentence fragments and letting you know how “HOT” you look tonight. Your right foot is next to his left foot and you’re both pretty much standing side-by-side with his left side matching your right side not only at the shoes but in your body positions. This is usually the position when they unexpectedly put the wrap on you with (what arm?) yes- their left arm. It comes up and across your right shoulder and across to the left side of your neck. If he’s not your Husband, Dad or Brother etc. – it shouldn’t be there if not welcomed. Simply widen the distance between your own feet, just a little and now imagine what he would look like like. Make a picture in your mind and see it………..pause……….he would be a wide open target with his hand that’s on your shoulder, now it’s taken out of play. He can’t defend a counter attack to the core of his body with that left arm and the right arm is just too far away. You ‘ve gotten a little wider base (or stance) by slightly working a little space between your feet as we discussed earlier. You are more stable and balanced now while still having both arms and hands to work with.
Finally, we “deliver the package” – sounds cool huh? This will happen in a “split second” – like the speed of playing the hand-slap game! Just drop - by first pushing against the floor, freeing both feet just a hair, then settling down while spreading your feet a little wider than they were and allowing your knees to collapse as fast as stepping off a cliff! Stop, by locking up (or tensing up the legs and feet) your wider stance, so that you’re a few inches lower than when the “shoulder/neck wrap” was applied. At the very moment of the slight drop you just did, bring your right hand from about waist height or a little higher and smash deeply into the jerk’s groin area or the abdomen, if it’s just an obnoxious friend. He will drop like a stone from the groin shot and 100% guaranteed he’ll either remove the offending arm himself as he grabs – too late - at his crotch area, first as a defense reflex but ending up as cradling the sore spot. At worst case scenario, you might have to walk away from his loosened hold, brushing or shrugging it off as you walk away briskly to safety or enough to turn and safely face the opponent, as the situation requires.
If you wanted to walk away the “opposite” direction as you were facing when this occurred, dip under his arm, ducking your head a smidge and step backwards deeply with your right / left leg (best to step with the leg closer to the other party) and bring the other foot right behind and you’ll be behind him. You might have to use the same hand you just struck him with, to brush his arm up over your head as you step back – under – and behind him. Remember to be fast means follow the instructions – drop and spread instantly and deliver the groin shot the moment you are re-set. The use of a kubotan increases power exponentially – driving the business end into the groin or abdomen, while doing this defensive move, instead of using the fist, gives even the smallest woman the assurance of delivering maximum pain! “Anyone” can do this, no matter if you’re weak or not a skilled martial artist. Practice this a few times with a partner and you’ll own another sneaky little tool in your self defense tool box!

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